Music Monday: Even When I’m at My Darkest

is it possible that the Lord can use me at my worst?
even when I don’t feel like I have everything together?
even when I don’t feel okay?
even when I didn’t practice everyday?
even when I didn’t pray today?
even when I’m in the middle of a muddy emotional-relational-place of healing process that leaves me feeling all sorts of emotions-feelings-hurts-and very raw.

is it possible that when I admit all these things God can still use me?
is it possible that God would rather use the broken pieces then the picture perfect version of me?
is it possible that God loves me even at my worst? even the puffy eyes, snot-tears, makeup running down my face-me? even the single-girl-blues-me? even the in-the-middle-of-healing-process me?
is it possible that God can do more with messy me than “perfect” me?

{I started writing these thoughts a few days ago, and was mostly just thinking about them. I just downloaded the new Ascend the Hill album and this song stuck out in a big way.}

Even When I’m At My Darkest by Ascend the Hill from their new album, O Ransomed Son

Even When I’m At My Darkest (by Ascend the Hill) lyrics

Before I took a breath you knew me
You called me by my name
Even when I’m at my darkest
You know me all the same

Every hair on my head you’ve numbered
And every thought within
Even when I cannot see you
I feel you closer than my skin

In my darkest dreams they find me
My failures haunt me in the night
Broken image of creation
Twisting, turning, hiding from the light

Then I heard a voice so clear
Like deep calling deep and I could hear
I felt your spirit drawing near
Breathing life in me; destroying every fear

My spirit woke with a hopeful plea
Each fighting breath resonating in me
You broke the chains to set me free
You gave me a song to lift my eyes and sing

Lift up your head
Lift your head, ’cause help has come
Lift up your heart
Lift your heart, His will be done
Lift up your hands
Lift your hands and praise the one
Lift up your song
Lift your song O Ransomed Son

Before I took a breath you knew me
You called me by my name
Even when I’m at my darkest
You know me all the same

Download their new album here:
http://www.comeandlive.com/CLD/AscendTheHill-Son/

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One Comment Add yours

  1. this is the way how i feel!, thanks for sharing, God bless you :)

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